Viagra Revenge - why you shouldn't have a six pack when you are in your late 40's

So this is a true secret story.

My brother-in-law, has just celebrated his birthday (in the high 40’s.)

Young looking, fit, kite surfing, six pack taunting bastard that he is.

So he is having dinner with an older friend who starts expounding on the wonders of Viagra.

“There are two types of Viagra, a strong tablet for old bullets, and a gentle 250mg tablet that you can take one every three days or so”.

His friend, like a drug dealer offering you your first hit for free, tells him he’ll give him a single capsule to try.

Interest piqued, he negotiates hard and walks away with three.

I get a reasonably awkward-feeling report back over the telephone the next day.

Regardless of how long they have been married. His wife is my sister after all.

The mild tablet is definitely the way to go.

You don’t fall asleep after getting through your only rations.

This is not a one course meal.

He gives me a glowing, glowing report.

Nice to know.

The kicker was that he was so impressed with it he went and bought a pack of like 530 boxes from the pharmacy. It might have been a carton of 30 packs.

The other thing was, he was kind of sheepish and awkward about buying it, being as young looking as he is.

So he slinks to the back of the pharmacy to the prescriptions counter, waits until nobody is around, and then quietly and secretively asks to buy a box.

He is good a slinking.

He is slightly alarmed when he sees the box though.

It is of olympic proportions and as heavily branded as a Christmas tree.

Shitsake, but no problem, he plans to cradle it in his arms and then slip through to the counter and pay before anybody notices him.

I should probably mention that he lives in the very small coastal town of Betty’s Bay, just  outside of Cape Town.

Population about 679 or thereabouts.

You want to keep your secrets secret.

And here is the thing.

This was one of those moments when God is re-affirmed (and as having a sense of humour too.)

In South Africa, when you buy prescription meds, they have small cages, the size of a shopping basket. They put all your prescription meds in the cage, and you then take this to the teller to pay. The cage is either locked or closed with a cable tie.

So before his eyes, the guy at the prescription counter, lifts his box of Viagra high into the air for all to see, and then lowers it into a completely visible cage and proceeds to take about ninteen and a half minutes to lock the lid.

There is only one way to carry those cages. Proudly in front of you like you are showing off a prize canary in a canary cage.

Beautiful. Just priceless.

Thirteen and a half minutes later the entire Betty’s Bay knows he was on Viagra.

“Don’t be a doos and write this on your blog okay”

Of course not. Of course I won’t.

What do you think I am. A prick?